It was a joy to start my ‘return to business’ last week with my amazing and inspirational clients.
I had to share this top tip that one business leader is implementing to improve their homelife, mobile phone jail! I didn’t know this was a thing but I can imagine the benefit!
In my opinion, one of the greatest leadership skills and attribute that everyone can access is PRESENCE. It directly contributes to increased and magical levels of intuition!
Presence has become increasingly challenging to access in the modern world of overload, overwhelm, over stimulation, over thinking and generally being stuck in our heads….mobile phones.
The doors to greater presence began to open for me a few years ago with my coaching training as you learn how to really really listen of course.
It hadn’t occurred to me that listening to myself was just as important as listening to others! It took me many more years to really understand what presence was and to begin to properly integrate it into my whole life after realising how much I lacked this ability in other areas!
The lack of presence was mostly due to my own insecurities and the incessant limiting beliefs and thoughts that swam around my head!
Presence has an enormous impact on our personal and professional relationships and indeed on the relationship we have with ourselves. In fact, I would say that the level of presence we have with ourselves is the real giveaway!
Questions to consider levels of Presence (of course I ask a lot of questions, I am a coach!). Plus extra personal bits from me.
1. Do we listen to what our body is telling us?
I used to cram my body with anything that would keep it going so I could be more ‘productive’ – it was nothing short of abuse! I can’t believe how I used to live, I have apologised to my body for all that I have put it through and for the verbal abuse and criticism it has received from me.
2. Can we observe our thoughts and discern between what is helpful or judgemental?
The more we practice really listening to the entourage in our heads, the more we discover about our beliefs and projected reality. I am so glad nobody could read my mind back then before I did the ‘real work’ on myself because quite frankly, it was a terrifying place 😉
3. Can we truly hear what others are really saying?
Without distraction and with proper eye contact?
Without working out what we are going to say next to get our point across.
Or perhaps we are not really able to listen because we are desperately trying to figure out what they want us to say or how to get it ‘right’ or even how we are going to fix it all?
4. Can we access peace?
Generally suggesting a level of inner peace here not the kind that comes from a bottle or anywhere external! I tried most of those things, they don’t work long-term lol!
5. Can we accept the present moment and ourselves without condemnation and comparison?
Big one! Acceptance is huge, it’s a long road with many twists and turns but it is most definitely a path to peace. Whenever we are comparing ourselves to others, we have lost the power of presence.
6. Can we be present with our emotions / feelings, rather than distracting ourselves from them or re-running old patterns?
This is one of the greatest and most empowering lessons I have learned (and of course still get tested on because I am human and emotions are powerful). Change your patterns and you can literally change your life!
Maybe there is some malfunctioning guilt loitering or fear of abandonment seeping through, the list is endless!
7. Are we able to be still?
With no distractions, no addictions, just ‘being’?
Can we be alone without feeling lonely? Can we find stillness of the mind without the racing thoughts? Can we sit without accessing the ‘to do’ list and without getting jittery about what to do next?
I think that’s enough for now and how brilliant that there are 7 questions (I had no idea how many there would be because I just write as it flows) because 7 was regarded as the perfect number in ancient times.
Not that we want to be perfect……because there’s no presence in perfectionism!